A glimpse into my mind would be an amusement park ride gone a muck. If a switch exists to trip the breaker then I haven’t found it. Attempts at meditation in the traditional sense, elude me. Period.
Sometimes I find a type of meditation during focused creation, climbing and yoga but whenever I try to sit and simply still my mind – I flail. I see myself as a meditation-type of person. I admire people who meditate regularly. Just even five minutes a day but despite New Year’s Resolutions and mini-breakthroughs- I have never acquired the habit.
Actually it was never my idea to go to a multi-day silent retreat. Well - a romantic whiff of the idea did cross my mind when I read “Eat. Pray. Love.” I could certainly put India on my Bucket List as a destination. But when I think of India my mind goes first to images of delicious erotic relief sculptures and the Kama Sutra. The idea of sitting on my butt in the same position without moving or talking for hours sounds about as appealing as a glop of overcooked canned spinach.
I am curious though. Curious enough that somehow the idea of attending a multi-day meditation retreat pecks away like an incessant woodpecker whenever I add something to my Bucket List. My girlfriend Amy feeds the woodpecker with her enthusiasm. I admire how much she has grown spiritually. Strongly committed to practice, growth, acceptance and compassion – she has wowed me with her insight and lack of judgment. Amy continues to send me invitations to retreats. Presented by Amy, the retreat takes on the wholesome compelling beauty of a plate of freshly picked crispy clean organic spinach.
So I filled out an application today. Psyched and scared. Excited and intimidated. I just may be attending a five day Insight Meditation Retreat this spring…