Why Climb Ice?! (has more to do with my art than you think)

I am crazy about climbing and even crazier about climbing ice.  ICE?!!!  Yup.  I’ve tried to reason that one out myself and can’t.  How can a sport where frozen fingers, bitter cold cramps, huge helpings of danger, long difficult approaches and a guarantee of suffering be something to be crazy for?

Ah…but the ice.  The ice!  Constant changing sculpture…capturing light, holding light, bouncing light, sucking light, reflecting light, spitting light.  Magic.  The stuff of crystal balls…enticing…confusing…delicate and impressive.  Like the eyes of the snake in the Walt Disney version of Jungle Book…ice entices.  “Trust in me…eeeeeeeee,” the snake sings, his eyes spinning, working their magic.  Allure, hypnotism and like Mogli I am drawn in grinning stupidly.

“You…are…so…beeaaauuuuutifulllllll…I say all dreamlike.

But then comes the moment of getting down to business…which means getting my feet off of the ground and that is where the voices come in.  I’ve a zillion of them.  “You haven’t eaten enough.”  “You are not strong enough”  “You’re nuts.”  Maybe its too early…too late…the ice too hard…too soft…too long…too blue.  What if these weren’t the right gloves?  Underwear?  Chap stick?  Egads the voices can be loud and obnoxious like a kindergarten class before school.  But the bell rings…the voices get louder and the activity even more frenzied before the teacher claps her hands yelling, “Settle down”  I send the thoughts to their desks…better yet…I try to shut them up inside the desks and worry about the mess later.  Right now I gotta climb.

And so I do.  Clumsy at first…I know and now accept the fact that it takes me awhile to warm up to any activity I am doing.  Others leap out of the starting gate and whiz into things.  I wheeze.  But long after their jumpstart I’ve found a pace and a place in my mind where the energizer bunny lives…I can keep going and going and going.  Thank god.  Somehow I find myself being of the right constitution to keep plodding.  Onward and upward…one foot in front of the other…or an ax placement in the ice a toe kicking a crampon point in…I can make myself keep going.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After the clumsy klutzy start, the doubts and dreams tumble and jumble together creating an intoxicating tonic that quenches my thirst for living.  The same elixir propels me to create - pushing boundaries and scaring myself in the studio day after day.  Art happens in the places and spaces outside the comfort zone.  Curiosity, drive and passion push.  Art happens when I get my feet off of the ground and the Energizer Bunny steps in to propel me forward.  Much of art is plodding - one chisel mark after another – chasing a vision sparked by light.  Art making is as ethereal as water – flowing or momentarily frozen – constantly changing, challenging, and compelling.  Humbling.  Inticing.  Adventurous art is a leap of faith finessed with skill and the kind of sharpened intuition which comes from a bold spirit tuned in.

 

 

 

 

 

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Ice is Nice

I debated Saturday night whether to spend Super Bowl Sunday on a ski tour around Bunsen Peak in Yellowstone (wouldn’t be able to take Zaydee) or ski near Chico Hot Springs with Zaydee and include a soak afterwards.  I woke early feeling a bug in my bones and knew I had to cancel ski plans with my girlfriend to hunker down in my cozy cabin while snowflakes fell big as cotton balls.  Seems like everyone around me has been sick and alas – finally – I succumbed. 

 

 

BUT – being ill has its little blessings.  Sipping tea, I talked for 2 hours by phone with my dear friend Wynn in Nashville.  After weeks of phone tag my couch time allowed talk time.  I read a book – what shouldn’t be but seems to have become a luxury in my busy world.  I looked up some artists who inspire me on the internet to see their new creations.  I soaked in my beloved claw foot tub.  I slept.

Luckily a few days before the bug I enjoyed a relatively warm day playing on ice with friends and have a few pictures to share.

 

Cool amphitheater of ice at Big Sky.

The extra bulge in my coat is a warm pair of fat gloves...

Climbing behind frozen falls is fun and challenging...

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Monday morning - humming, sipping, and sniffing

Monday morning:  Temps are below zero and dropping.  The landscape is soft and pale as crystals hang and wait their turn to cling in a delicate doily-way to trees, grass, mailboxes and eyelashes.  The kids are off to school and a week with their mother.  Last week was full of basketball games, after-school practices, and homework.  Ali’s 6th grade girl’s basketball team had a tournament at Gallatin Gateway Friday night.  They lost their 2nd game by only ONE point when a foul against a teammate in the last 6 seconds brought the chance to get two free-throws and possibly tie the game, (which would have put them into overtime and a chance to win).  Alas, the poor little nervous gal made one out of two baskets and they lost the game.  She broke out in tears but got hug after hug from her teammates.  I am impressed at the heart and gumption these young gals show.  Ali is a pint-size force to be reckoned with.  

Saturday night we had a pajama party with Mom. Sami baked two different batches of cookies, Paul made popcorn in a pot on the stove and we watched “The Sound of Music”  cuddled under blankets on the couches.  I thought I had seen the movie enough times in my life that I wasn’t particularly keen on our choice of entertainment but the kids are gearing up and doing tryouts for the musical at school.  BUT I got goose bumps in the first few moments and several times throughout.  We thoroughly enjoyed the movie and I have been singing ever since (though nothing like Julie or the girls for that matter!).  Julie Andrews is such a bright sparkle isn't she?  Speaking of sparkle - Mom wore black lounge pants with rhinestones to qualify for the pj party dress code.  Jake lasted half-way through the movie but got squirmish and went to bed early announcing that he wanted to be rested up for our big ski day at Bridger Bowl.   

Skiing with these three munchkins is SO much fun!!!  Jake rips it up!  Sami and Ali explore the mountain and pick runs with confidence.  We laughed and whooped our way down slopes, ate a picnic lunch and sipped hot chocolate.  The temps neared zero.  I was more-than-a wee-bit-thankful that we took several breaks in the upper lodge to warm up since I was so sore from Crossfit the day before.  Getting back into shape after a year of healing leaves me with plenty of sore muscles but it is more fun to be sore from playing and working out than from major surgery!  Humming "Sound of Music" tunes, smelling my favorite Volupsa "Baltic Amber" candle, and drinking tea on this happy Monday morning - the eve of a new month in a year that has launched as especially promising and full of rich blessings.

 

 

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Windows and Pipes

Paul took this picture Thursday.  I haven’t been on site since Monday morning (this is a Bozeman week with the munchkins).  I can hardly wait to stand inside and look out a window.  Just opening a door will make all of this seem more real.  Plumbing is going in.  I hear I have a shower stall.  Duel flush toilet from Costco (great price!) will go in soon.   We haven’t set up a cistern for water yet.  Keep your fingers crossed that we find water the next time we drill!  Itch’n to move in!

 

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Pick of the Week

Each week - one original artwork is offered at half price with all of the money going to charity.  "Rizzo" looks to me like a bit of an insomnia sufferer like myself or maybe he has simply had too much coffee.  "Rizzo" is the pick and Tibetan Doctors are the recipent.  My friend Mike Cooperstien is actively and soulfully involved.  Just follow this link to learn more:

Please Help Tibetan Doctors

Click here to purchase "Rizzo"

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New York Debut of the Frog Bronze!

New York!  New York!  (the place so nice they named it twice!)  The frog bronze titled “Spring” is in route to the BIG APPLE for the N.A.W.A Open Small Works Exhibition.  Here’s how it happened:

I made a pact with myself to enter one juried show each month this year.  I have only entered 2-3 juried shows in my life and the last one was the Western Design Conference in Cody, Wyoming - well over a decade ago.  So I started by entering a show in December just to begin to get myself into the habit.  Voila!  My sculpture was accepted!!!  I have been told that over 650 artists entered and only 65 were accepted.  "Spring" is one of five sculptures selected for the show.  The exhibit is at the National Association for Women Artists – which is the oldest professional women's fine art organization in the United States (founded in 1889).   So here are the exhibit details:

Exhibition Date:    February 2-22

Place:                The N.A.W.A Gallery  80 Fifth Avenue Suite 1405, New York, NY

Reception:           February 9, 2011  5-7 pm

If you make it to the show or the reception call or write to me – I want to hear ALL about it!  I haven’t the moola for a jaunt to New York but I am tickled pink that this little bugger has a debut in the big city.

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Devil Woman Saloon - peek at the sculptures

  Finally a few picture peeks of the finished sculptures at the Devil Woman Saloon for you to see.  I will be frank.  Once we stuffed these buggers into their allotted corners, they simply “died” in the dark.  The post-placement moment was seriously and painfully anti-climatic and a far cry from the expected “TA DA!!!”

Yes my client was there.  Brenda seemed happy and excited but then she is a super nice person (that’s an understatement) and could very well have been just being kind.  I grabbed her teeny tiny long haired teacup chiwawa Cami and bolted to the ranch warehouse in search of some lights.  With Cami tucked in the crook of my arm, I loaded up with clamp lights and extension cords, crossed the ranch to the Saloon and attempted to “show” the sculptures with a bit of hard harsh light illumination.

Better.  At least Brenda could get a bit of an idea but the sculptures were far from “finished” and not worth applauding.  The delivery day was a confusing gamut of emotions.  Honestly I felt as if I had crossed valleys, climbed peaks, thrashed my way through thick jungles, inhaled buckets of sawdust and sat my tuckered scratched and famished body down eagerly to a deliciously prepared full five course dinner at a table set with white linen and one of those silver shiny cover thingees over my plate lifted with a polished flair by a decked-out butler and there…. Before my ravenous eyes and centered on my fine china plate….lay… (drum roll please) …a little smelly dog poo.

Ok.  The sculptures are a far cry from dog poo.  They might even be GRAND without upstaging their surroundings as planned but first they must be lit properly.  The excessive emotions could simply be chalked up to: a) being a passionate artist b) being an emotional girl c) hormones d) the culmination of expectation after a rather challenging journey.  I am guessing all of the above played into an unsettled feeling that left me cranky (poor Paul) and far from satisfied.  We sat down in the saloon and shared a few shots in “celebration” but that was a bit like planting a flag before reaching the summit: anti-climatic.  The next day Paul and I scampered to the nearest city in search of lights.  We scoured lighting shops, landscape warehouses, Lowe’s and Home Depot in the hopes we would not have to return to the Devil Woman Saloon empty-handed but the specialized lighting we need is not something places keep in stock.  We had to order the lights.  I spent another day putting the final parts and pieces together (whip, crystals, trident, etc.)  We screwed a few little $8.00 desk lights on top of the sculptures so I wouldn’t have to leave Texas with them totally in the dark.  I felt better and we snapped a few photos. 

The “Devil Woman Saloon” sculptures have been tangled up in a long road of unexpected twists and turns.  We launched the project nearly 18 months ago believing I could whip these buggers out in a few months time but I blew the deadline by one year(a first for me)  But then last year was full of challenging “firsts” and unexpected painful endings.   I have taken more-than-one deep breath, calmed down, accepted the lighting delay and returned to Montana.  The “Devil Woman Sculptures” are in place.  The proper lighting and professional photos will happen next month.  Thank goodness Brenda has such a big heart and faith in me. 

Visit my YouTube channel for project videos

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Up before the chickens

COCK A DOODLE DOO!!!  The roosters clucked a cheery loud hello this morning in the moonlight when I walked to the ranch office with a cup of tea and my computer.  Yesterday they just clucked a bit and helped guide my way through the pre-dawn fog in the wet heavy darkness.  I guess the chickens appreciate moonlight and moon shadows too since they up earlier and cheerier today.  I love the moderate temperature, the dank earthy smells, and the clucking and carrying on.  Right now a covey of ducks are swimming in a big puddle right outside the office door and from the sounds of it – they are having quite the gossip session!

Ranch sounds and smells put a grin on my face and a bit of a song in my heart – a different song than home, where everything around my cabin is wild.  Nothing is cultivated (another song and reason to grin).  I didn’t grow up on a ranch or a farm but as a young child I always felt a bit of romantic longing for the lifestyle.

I like being up before anyone else.  Quiet time.  Meditation time.  Yoga and a cup of tea time.  But I must admit having barnyard feathered friends clucking and quacking away hypes up the expectation of sunrise like musicians tuning their instruments builds the pre-performance energy.  The silly little critters seem to be hell-bent on waking up a sleepy headed, blurry-eyed sun – just their clattery insistence oddly enough elicits a rather domesticated feeling of family.

So I settled in to sip tea and write when my phone rang.  Paul had just woken up, turned on the TV (something we don’t have at my home) when he noticed a show called, “Woodsculpting.”  He thought it might be of interest to me so while he waited for his coffee he settled in to watch the show and there I was!   The show was about me - a whole show – at 6 a.m. in Texas.  So I crossed the ranch yard again, roosters crowing, ducks quacking, Hobo the German Sheppard barking and a cup of tea in my hand to watch the show.  Filmed years ago for DIY – I have never actually watched the episode on TV – let alone a gigantic BIG plasma screen TV in a saloon where I had just installed a few big sculptures.

Oh yeah!  THAT!!!  The sculpture installation…!!  Yesterday was a big day.  Heavy mesquite logs-turned-into-sculptures were unloaded outside and set up inside the Devil Woman Saloon.  We used a John Deer tractor and broke a Genie Lift but luckily no injuries to people or the art occurred.  You’ll have to wait for the final pictures since today I will be putting the finishing touches on the sculptures (trident, Swarovski crystals, whip and lights):

 

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Twenty Five Photos in Billings Gazette Feature

 

I love the fact that Zaydee made it into the feature article written by Donna Healy of the Billings Gazette!  Many of you knew Shiva, the special dog who shared a precious chunk of my life with me.  Shiva used to always upstage me whenever photographers showed up.  A natural model and total ham for the camera, Shiva would glean the lime-light whenever it so much as glanced my direction – just look at the past articles and TV spots on my Artist Page. Zaydee is a whole other cookie.  Horribly abused before being rescued by a sweet Montana couple, Zaydee showed up in my life as a bit of a basket case.  She’s come a LONG way!!  No longer scared of her own shadow - much less the power tools in my studio – she relaxes and hangs out with me while I work.  She barks to let me know if someone is around (usually I have ear plugs in and am oblivious).  Zaydee has warmed up to the camera – or at least relaxed enough that Bob Zellar from the Billings Gazette captured this photo of her napping in the mesquite sawdust.  The whole article along with a short video can be viewed on the Billings Gazette website (yes – Zaydee is in the video too!!!) 

 

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Two Little Artworks for a good cause

I am going to drop off two Works on Paper at Printing for Less for a fundraiser.  The e-mail from a friend of mine explained:

“There's a fundraiser at my work place for a coworker's wife (Carrie Kling) who has been sick for years. She has reflex sympathetic dystrophy.  It is a disease of the central nervous system that causes intense pain. She needs to get another treatment in Tampa, FL which their insurance doesn’t cover and they have tapped out the financial resources from family, friends and personal savings for the first two treatments that she received.”

My sweet little town has a number of frame shops – all of which generously often donate framing of the piece.  The believe the most one of my Works on Paper has raised in a fundraiser auction is $300.00 – that was for a museum if I remember right – not a lot but little bits add up.  Always happy to help, the tables were turned last year after my own surgery.  Paul Meyer from Vern’s Wood Goods approached me with the idea of a fundraiser – for me.  Boy did that stir some emotion and push my comfort zone!!  What a gift!!!  The fundraiser (of course) was a gift but more than that – the opportunity to step fully into humility and embrace receiving was an opportunity to grow.  Full of hesitation, I tugged on the uncomfortable tight-fitting, breath-constricting role of receiver and found that it quickly conformed and fit comfortably with the added bonus of WARM FUZZIES.  Paul Meyer and I have never met but check out this quote from the fundraiser idea e-mail he approached me with:

“If you want to carry this burden on your own and spare your community the privilege and rewarding pleasure of supporting you, well, you will miss out on one of life's great treasures, and one of the benefits of being a free spirit.  Don't stop being a free spirit NOW for crying out loud!”

He nailed me.  He compassionately strummed exactly those notes which screamed loudest when I found myself struggling to accept.  Paul Meyer gave me the opportunity to grow and feel.  What a blessing.  I don’t know Carrie Kling but my heart hurts for the challenge of dystrophy and the money challenges which add insult to injury at a time of struggle in her life.  Have you struggled with the role of receiving?

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Clearstory - oh glory!!

Sub zero temps put a halt to progress this week until yesterday when the boys were able to nearly finish the clearstory!!  The purpose of the clearstory it to allow ambient light into my studio (the windows haven’t been cut yet- they will be much bigger than the picture shows).  The BIG bonus of this particular clearstory is the nap room which will be in the back.  YUP!!  Thanks to Paul’s brainstorm, the nap room will sit up there like an observatory – perfect place to close my peepers or blow kisses to the sky!!!

 

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From wood to bronze - a new sculpture!

I don’t believe that has ever happened to me before.  But then many things happened during this past year that never happened to me before.

I lost socks.

Seriously I don’t believe I have ever lost a sock in my life…a pair of stockings or two but never a sock.  Stockings are a given because stockings are uncomfortable, unnatural, inevitably itchy and confining.  So off they come at any opportune or inopportune moment.  But a sock?!  Never.  Now I have several lonesome mis-matches loitering at my cabin and Paul’s house.  He and the kids have a gazillion mismatched socks.  I used to raise my eyebrows and shake my head at the big basket of single socks mostly because Paul had socks in there but now I do too.  I inherited a huge pile of mismatched socks when I opened my heart to this family, which is no big deal and kind of sweet but I never expected to join the quandary of lonesome socks! 

I also dented my truck.  Twice.  Something I have never done during decades of driving but two times I backed into unseen obstacles last year.  I still shake my head, shrug my shoulders, and grimace when I see those big dents.  Dang.  I am chocking it up to last year.  By anyone’s definition, last year was exceptionally challenging and I have the dents to prove it.

BUT – I have digressed since the purpose of this post is to introduce the NEW bronze.  I glanced at my blog this morning and realized I’ve forgotten to post a picture of “Munch” even though the photos have existed since before Christmas.  Lordy.

 

“MUNCH” limited edition of 19

Look back two posts and you will see this bugger in its original state of wood.  I love how the chisel marks and even the wood grain are captured in bronze.  We went a few rounds at the foundry getting the patina just right.  Of course the patina process was happening the same time I was working around the clock to finish the Devil Woman Saloon sculptures AND move out of the space…what a whirlwind!  Here is another view of the finished piece:

Eighteen out of nineteen SOLD before the sculpture was officially launched on my site last week.  Patron Members always get the inside scoop and first chance at new art and this time they snatched ‘em up!!  I don’t blame them.  I would like to keep #19 myself but for now the bugger is for sale on my site.  A warm content feeling mixed with a bit of awe wraps my heart when sculptures find enthusiastic loving homes. 

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Happy happy New Year!!!

How did I get so far behind on my blog? I’ve zillions to share from nearly two weeks of holiday cheer with Paul and the kids. We spent Christmas together for the second time at my little cabin on the mountain (their choice). They picked out a tree after school just before dark on a single digit temperature day. Warmed by hot chocolate and enthusiasm we worked together under their (well…mostly Sami’s) supervision to decorate my cabin. Lights and more lights wrapped rustic fir beams and trimmed windows. 
 
The tree was the biggest we’ve stuffed into my wee little space yet. Imagine a tree in a one room dining, kitchen and living room space turned into a festive magic indoor camp for them at night since they sleep in piles on the couch and floor. My little 28’ x 28’ home bulges near-to-splitting with life when we are all here. 
Each day brought fun stories and photo opportunities worth blogging about but I ignored my computer for the most part during the past two weeks.  Honestly – it felt good. We played board games, hiked and sledded. I got out and climbed ice.  I cooked my first ever full-on Christmas dinner (ham and all the fixings for my family and four guests)! I am still amazed at how scrumptious everything was. Seriously – cooking has never been a keen interest of mine but bless my little old gas Wedgewood stove and those awesome kids who love to help in the kitchen! We pulled it off, licked our plates, and even turned the ham hock into a batch of split pea soup (also a first for me).
 
We had a sledding party New Year’s Day despite the single digit temps. Living at the end of the road near the top of a mountain in Montana offers AMPLE sledding runs. We have the standard short and sweet hills but we capitalize on the 2 mile downhill on my road (four wheeler pulls them on the sleds back up) and the other two long ½ mile runs with switchbacks, trees, and STUNNING views – not that anyone could see through the powder. Folks came in bundled like Eskimos left in a snowstorm with icicles hanging off their eyelashes, noses and chins. Plenty of hot chocolate, whiskey and Baileys kept people in the sledding mood. The sky was blue, snow fresh and fluffy, and the sunset stunning.
 
I have sledding video footage destined to be posted soon. I also have a nasty little cold and piles and piles of catching up to do but find myself full of joy, energy, and gumption while enjoying a few quiet days at my humble cozy little cabin. 
 

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Carving to Casting - the launch of a new edition

Sneak peak of a recently completed carving taken just outside the foundry where it was molded and cast into bronze. The new edition titled “Munch” features a momma and baby bunny stuffing themselves with cabbage.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I began the carving in Cody Wyoming while attending the “Women Who Design the West show.” We were asked to bring something to demonstrate…thus a new little piece began in September.  Last month I swept up the little pile of woodchips and delivered a finished carving to the foundry. 

“Munch” will be cast in an edition of 19 - which means only 19 of these cute little buggers will ever be made. Photos of the finished bronze will be posted this week.  Stay tuned...

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Taking Shape - 2nd story studio

WOW! Paul has only put eight days into construction and already I can do the “Snoopy Dance” on the 2nd story!!! 
Joy! Joy! The little room in back upstairs will be the painting/drawing studio – free from the sawdust of sculpture building in the main studio. The huge steel beams are part of the hoist system which will allow me to lift and move large objects…er…art…all by myself. Wahoo!!!

I shopped for toilets online early yesterday morning. Here is my dream toilet:

But of course such prettiness is not in the budget and then a brand new toilet was just given to me by a friend who doesn’t need it. Now, what does a studio-less artist do with a free toilet while construction is happening on her new studio? Ah ha!! I just might have to paint my own toilet. We’ll see. Truth is - it took a chunk of yesterday just to catch up on the HUGE bin of mail and bills. I’ve a zillion projects planned without throwing a toilet bowl on the “to do” list but -well…?!
 

 

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Sculptures Drying - Ladies Trying

Eleven straight days working 12-14 hours each day at the studio and those big o’l mesquite logs have transformed. Almost complete, they are standing under the temporary hoist system drying. Hand hewn chisel marks under umpteen layers of my own concoction of mixed stains - inlayed turquoise and swarovski crystals complete the sculptures. My paws are sore, my neck is creaky and my fingernails are darkly stained. I left the studio yesterday completely fried and hungry for some air.
Today I got up before dawn to join two girlfriends.  We threw our packs in the back of the truck and rolled over icy roads up the narrow canyon to what JoJo has dubbed “The Hyalite House” for the annual women’s clinic at the Bozeman Ice Climbing Festival. Since I fell in love with ice climbing at the festival years ago, I have returned each year as a volunteer eager to share my love of ice with others. Falling in love with ice climbing was easy; finding boots to fit my little feet in a sport dominated by men was the tough part. A year or two after ice climbing entered my life, my friend Supy began an ice climbing clinic just for women despite the fact that many of the local guides and retailers doubted a female audience existed for such a clinic. The turnout of curious brave women willing to push their limits to try something new within a supportive environment was overwhelming. The women’s clinic quickly grew to the largest on-ice-clinic for women in the world. Always sold out, more than 60 women come from all over to paricipate in the one-day clinic taught by some of the best female ice climbers in the world.
 
I volunteer each year to carry ropes, belay, and help coach the eager group of women. All ages and a variety of backgrounds make up the all female mob. Many of the women aren’t rock climbers or climbers at all. Some have never even tried a winter sport. What joy it is to watch gal after gal transform! Belief, compassion, patience, humor, and a few good tips can make all the difference. Intimidated by the ice, psyched about the “bad ass” feel of an ice ax in their hand, brightened by their accomplishment - what the women take away from this day of camaraderie is a big dose of self confidence, sore muscles, and HUGE grins.
 
Today was a treat. Crisp air, fresh snow, sculptural ice and the transformation that comes through empowerment make the volunteer day more-than-worthwhile. The sculptures are drying. Tomorrow I will pack up the studio. But tonight I imagine more than one gal is dreaming a few new dreams and perhaps tomorrow many women will awaken with a broadened belief in what is possible.

WAHOOOOOO!!!!

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Bit of a Curve Ball

Post-trip bliss had me beginning to believe that the drama in my world might be simmering down enough to have more of a balanced routine in my life. More time for friends, outdoor excursions, and the exciting conclusion of a large sculpture project done during reasonable hours at the studio…just in time for the holidays with Paul, my mom, and the kids.

Alas – the very morning this thought ambled longingly through my mind, I arrived at the studio and found a nasty eviction notice taped to the door. Long story but the short version is simply that the sweet folks who own the building have given it up in a painful hostage takeover forced by their new son-in-law. He’s an unpleasant 3-time felon thug who has not responded to our reasonable requests to rent the space for a few more months. Seems he would rather have the worn out shell-of-a-building sit vacant just as it did for four years before the three of us gals moved in. Panic. Deep breaths.  None of us want to be in a space with that kind of energy threatening us. So I’ve begun once again to pull double shifts and pop vitamin C to build up for the triple shifts it’ll take to finish the Devil Woman Saloon sculptures, pack and deliver a 5-piece large sculpture exhibition, and gather up all my studio stuff for storage. I have a week and a half. Paul will be gone to Carson City all of next week attending the funeral of his close childhood friend. Yesterday a girlfriend jumped in with lunch, did the grocery shopping for my mom, and took the girls to mom’s for cookie baking to give me more much-needed precious focused studio time. Kirston has found another space. We’re helping Stacey find something affordable. The walls are going up at my very own soon-to-be realized studio on the mountain. I’ve a zillion ideas for spending my studio-less time but right now I am in survival mode, cranking out piles of woodchips and sawdust and eating LOTS of cookies and chocolate.

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Home Sweet Home

Home sweet Home

Wind blows heavy hunks of snow off the trees dancing outside my window. Pale sky, white ground and the heaping mountainside outside the window embrace me with heart-warming familiarity. The desert trip was good in unexpected ways. Record breaking low temps kept my skin from lapping up the air and sun. We bundled under layers of sleeping bags while the tent bucked like a rodeo bull in one impressive storm after another. We mountain biked in sleet, moonlight and snow. We caught a bit of sun while climbing but found the warm rays elusive; easily nudged aside by insistent bone-chilling, finger-numbing wind.   I caught a cold. Surprisingly the trip highlight happened in the heart of the Vegas strip.
Let’s start at the beginning:

After a sleepless night of preparations, Paul and I set out before dawn in a snowstorm. Somewhere in Idaho we decided to bag our plans for Moab since storms were brewing there and seek the sun in Vegas. Scott and Leslie were game to meet us at Red Rocks, camping sites were plenty, and the forecast promising. 

 

We jumped on our bikes the first respite in a sleet-filled day and biked ‘til after dark under a full moon. Cactus like Suesse characters stood out in the moonlit desert scape. Fun stuff.

The next day’s headwind blew a cold right into my lungs. But we’d already booked a $20.00 room at Hooter’s Casino so the promise of a hot shower and warm bed kept me peddling. The “3 Mile Smile” downhill was a blast and worth it. We were quite a site rolling a cart with coolers and duffel bags through the blinking light casino early that evening. We were bundled up in biking/camping clothes - a stark contrast to the cleavage flashing Hooter girls. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After the Hooter's reprieve, we pitched our tents again.  Haunted by insomnia when much needed rest might have settled the cold lurking in my lungs, I almost took a day off for rest but we took off at dawn to tackle “Geronimo” – a fun multipitch five-hundred-and-something-foot climb. Climbing pitch after pitch up a rock face is one of my favorite kind of adventures. I coughed and sputtered my way up in the wind, froze during the four repels, but wouldn’t have missed the memory and adventure of a day on the rock with good friends.

Gifted with a beautiful post-climb sunset, we hugged Scott and Leslie goodby before finding another cheap Vegas Strip hotel room.  I needed a warm dry place to nurture the cold which had taken hold.

We settled into Circus Circus and set up camp.  Paul cooked elk spaghetti in the bathroom while I thawed in the tub. 

We returned to the rock but kept basecamp at Circus Circus.

Zaydee camped in the truck, under the topper, in her cozy bed and soaked in a bit of sun outside the Vegas Strip:

The nasty cold kept me from taking on the planned big adventures but it may have been a blessing-in-disquise since we decided to take advantage of our surroundings, splurge and see a show in Vegas. Thanksgiving Evening we ate warmed up Elk Spaghetti leftovers and fresh salad in our room before driving down the strip to MGM Grand for a  soul slurping, creativity engorging feast at “KA.” Cirque du Soleil can change your life. Serious. Four days after returning from the desert I still feel as if I am being fed intravenously from the experience of “KA.” Beyond words, I cannot think of the experience without goosebumps and an electric charge.  

What a gift!!! 

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Mixing Mud and Emotions - they pour the floor

Insomnia kept me stirring late these past few nights, wide-eyed and blinking at the stardust. My heart has been extra soft, gushy and pained these past two weeks as if all the sunshine in my life has illuminated the path of grief and loss. I feel more now than I did those first months after my father’s death. A friend offered some enlightenment; perhaps as I move out of pure survival mode I find myself in a place where support is strong, gifts are abundant and thus the grieving process amps up since I can process more. 

The Cosmos is right there with me, spinning an ever-perfect web. For instance, just last week Hospice held a special memorial tribute in the beautiful stained glass adorned chapel at the hospital. All those who passed away under Hospice care during the first six months of this year were acknowledged. A young pregnant musician accompanied the service with her sweet clear voice and guitar,  two ministers conducted the memorial. My mom, Paul, the kids and I took up a whole row in the tiny chapel.   Sun shone through the two story stained glass chapel wall. Stunning. A fountain splashed soothingly - a water whisper affirming life; cycles, continuity and comfort. 

Just a few moons ago I spent time alone in the chapel during my father’s brief hospital stay. After a routine doctor appointment Dad had been admitted to the hospital for tests. That evening Dad and I were told that he had fourth stage pancreatic cancer. Early the next morning I visited the chapel just after the sun came up. I completed a series of Sun Salutations (yoga) right there on the chapel floor with the soothing fountain coaching me to take deep breaths, find my center and focus on love. Here I was in that chapel again for a memorial service surrounded by my new family, sitting next to my little mother and listening to the fountain while taking deep breaths.

My own health has really turned a corner during the past month or two. Finally my middle is more like its old self. I no longer feel like a wide chasm cut my body into two disconnected parts with an echo bouncing in the wide open space between. The dark disappointing void is filling in.  Creativity burns bright and strong along with a notion that despite my inability to reproduce, I can still produce. Create. Give and receive. Lift, love, and laugh from my center. My “chi” (life force) once again burns bright and strong. Unsevered.
On top of the feelings and healings there is the whole gift of a studio. Blessings abound. Three weeks ago my patron and friend gave Paul the go-ahead to begin the project before she broke the news of her amazing gift to me with a phonecall.  I pulled over, listened as she told me her plans, hung up and cried. I couldn’t tell anyone that first week without crying. Happy tears. 
Since then the ground has been scraped, road made, hole dug, foundation poured, heated slab plumbed, poured and backfilled, septic put in, approved and buried. Power is to the site. The plans for a custom hoist system have passed inspection by an engineer, steel beams are ordered AND they have drilled for water. We haven’t found water yet but luck continues to shine since they got the floor poured and completed just hours before another winter storm.
 
During the last two weeks I completed a new carving which has gone to the foundry to become the first bronze edition created by me in oh-my-gosh-way-too-many-years! Feels good.  Pictures of the sweet little bunny-themed carving will be posted soon.  The Devil Woman Saloon sculptures are still in the works with some exciting developments. Challenging fun stuff. 
 
Energy and emotion buzz thoughts during sleepless nights. I must breath deep, feel all of it, field some of it, smile and take large drinks of sky - stardust and all.  
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